Life and such.

Things have truly been wonderful lately. It is so amazing what can happen when one aspect of your life, such as your health, is a non-issue in your daily life. I no longer wake up and wait around wondering what kind of day I am going to have. I don't have to sip on my coffee for two hours in the morning debating if I should leave the house and do something with my day. I can wake up and confidently proceed with my day without a fraction of the worry I am used to. I feel like once one part of your life improves, everything else falls into place and you start seeing other aspects of life in a new, positive light.

This, of course, means I am getting a little antsy. I have a lot of energy that I've been burning on exercise and just being outside. I find it hard to sit still at all. I haven't actually sat down and watched television in the longest time. There's just too many places I want to be and too many things I want to do. Nothing is mapped out for me and I am free to let my mood carry me wherever it wants to.

My time lately is consumed with being outdoors, going to Phillies games, being with friends and family, eating good food, reading, thinking about the future, and drinking not-so-good beer. With all of this increased activity, I've actually been having problems with my ostomy. Exercise, sweating, and this ridiculous summer heat have me a bit frustrated with how often I now I have to attend to my little buddy Steve. In addition, now that most of my output is out of my ostomy rather than my behind, the increased traffic certainly has an effect on how often it needs to be emptied and changed. I did have an "incident" at the Phillies game last week and I had to leave after 2 innings, but I was with the right person and after a few tears were shed and a few "F Bombs" directed towards Crohn's and my ostomy, I was over it.

Now I won't be going back to Maryland this week for a follow-up like I originally thought. They actually moved my appointment to mid-July on the same day I'll get my next Remicade infusion. That way I don't have to make two separate trips. This works out GREAT because I will be traveling to Maryland next weekend to see one of my dearest friends, Natalie, who will be home from England. Certainly two trips down there in one week would have been rough, so I'm glad they moved it. Once again, it's the little things this practice in Maryland does for me that make me feel like they genuinely care about my well being and take into consideration that I live 2 hours away.

Anyway, I also need to direct you all to an amazing site one of my Crohn's buddies directed me towards called uncoverostomy.com. She blogs about everything in her life, not just ostomy-related things. But I think it's pretty inspirational that a young female can be so open and comfortable with her body. Check it out if you wish.


Let the good times roll...

I think it's safe to say the Remicade is doing absolutely wonderful things. I just cannot even fathom why or how this drug works so well for me. I guess my body just needed that year and a half off of it because the differences are night and day. It's not even like I have to wonder if its working because things have completely changed, dramatically.

Honestly, I got my infusion on a Friday, and by Saturday I felt better. Insane, right? And then after that I feel like things only kept getting better and better. Right now I am satisfied with where I am at. I feel confident and comfortable carrying through with plans and I've certainly enjoyed my new-found freedom the past two weeks. Maybe a little bit too much. But hey, I deserve it!

I was really, really happy because I got to travel to Maryland on Thursday to see my best friend, Claire, in Frederick, MD. We took in a Frederick Keys game and then went out and had a wild time, as always. But I just cannot describe to you how good the freedom of health feels when I go out now. Sure, I still have to worry about my bag, but those problems are usually fixable and minor. And after visiting Claire I took a detour up north and strolled around the new museum at Gettysburg. Again, something I probably wouldn't have been comfortable doing two weeks ago...especially after the night we had.

Also, I've been eating fruits and vegetables again, which I basically removed from my diet before because they caused so many problems. I try not to go too crazy with them because it's still not perfect when I indulge in rubbish, but it's nice to have some variety back. I don't feel like my choices are simply carbs and meat all the time and that's a really nice thing to experience.

So now the next step you are wondering? I need to get this MRI done that I've been putting off for two weeks. I know it's going to show nothing but I want to have the results in time for my follow up in Maryland on the 23rd. I am hoping and praying that my doctor will be receptive to me inquiring about hooking these pipes back up. I know last time they hooked me back up they needed to do a colonoscopy to make sure things looked tame but perhaps there is something else they can do to make that judgment.

I just want to move on with my life. And even if they won't let me have the surgery sooner, I am still grateful that I am on Remicade and feeling this amazing.

What a difference a year makes, huh?


Thank God for Friends and Family

I still have been feeling fabulous. But feeling fabulous also makes you appreciate your friends and family that much more. You know, the sacrifices they have had to make and the level of understanding they have of your disease. Sometimes it's like they know my disease better than I know it. Well, almost.

I guess now that I've been getting out more I've come to realize that this isn't the easiest thing to explain to people. You never know who really cares when you meet someone new so you try to give them the "dumbed down" version, which really isn't sufficient at all, because it does not take into account how horrific and terrible the past year and a half have been. Yet, I do need to provide that version for some people, and for them, it's enough.

And then there are others who are genuinely concerned and want to learn more about Crohn's and how it has turned my life up-side down this past year. And for those people I do go into as much detail as I feel comfortable. I usually judge this on a person by person basis. And just like any conversation in life, you can become well aware within minutes if this person is someone you really think could benefit from hearing about your bowel problems. Yea, it's not for all.

And then there are my friends and family, who know it all and love me anyway. Who insist that I will find someone one day who will love me despite all of these things I have been through. I do have some amazing friends, whom I am only realizing now, are the most supportive and incredible people I could ever ask for to be by my side during a time like this. I have friends, well, one friend in particular, who has stuck by me INSANELY through all of this, even when I was so sick I didn't even want to speak to another human being let alone have my friend come and visit. And now I am flooded with emotions upon realizing how special it is that I have these relationships that I can be completely honest in. And not because I want to be honest, but because they have seen it all and stood by me and will call me out on my discrepancies.

I guess I'm pretty damn lucky.