Cabin Fever

I've been spending a lot of time indoors.  Trying to occupy myself with productive reading, baking, and television watching.  Yes, television can be productive.  I'm trying to remind myself that I only have to make it till Tuesday when I have my appointment with my GI to discuss (hopefully) me getting approved for Humira.  That thought in the back of my mind is keeping me going right about now.

I went out Friday night for a Christmas party and thankfully had no major issues.  I was a little worried being so far from home and drinking.  It's disconcerting just knowing you have a 45 minute drive home if anything goes wrong.  Thankfully I was with the right people and I had a few very minor issues.  I've been in this game a long time have become quite good at disguising when I don't feel well and making the most out of every situation.

I had lots to do last week and tried to get out of the house as much as possible but found myself very nervous.  I haven't had that in a long time.  Because lately, just when I've started to feel comfortable about being more adventurous, I'm hit with an emergent stomach crisis.  It makes leaving the house difficult.  Sometimes you drive all the way to your destination and just don't feel confident enough to get out of the car.  This is so far from the way I am when I am healthy.  When I'm healthy, I'm outgoing and always on the go.  I'm hiking in the park, taking Rudy for a walk, or sitting at the bar with my friends watching them get drunk.  It's hard not being that person.  And even harder when people don't seem to understand.

Sorry if all of this is vague.  I'll update everyone on Tuesday with hopefully good news about when I can get started with Humira.

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